For those of you who long for help

But may all who seek you rejoice and be glad in you; may those who long for your saving help always say, 'The LORD is great!'' Psalm 40:16

The family sweetheart. 

She doesn't walk. She could... 

She just doesn't. 

She's reminiscent of our last baby. Angel Baby. Who was content to be carried. She crawled until she was 19 months old, when she finally decided to walk. Yes, 19 months old. 

This little one is the same. She is too happy to just sit on a hip. I know those of you that have boys have absolutely ZERO capability of understanding this. My sister just stands in utter amazement. I'm not making this stuff up. Everytime I'm around Julie I say, 'See? She really isn't interested in moving. She's just content to watch the action. She's content to crawl a few inches and stop to enjoy.' 

Julie nods. And then she shakes her head in amazement.

And come to think of it, she doesn't talk much either.

She's the quintessential baby. 

And I love her for it. 

She has us all wrapped around her fat, chubby, sausage-link fingers. The girls fall over each other to hold her. She's so cool being picked up by little ones not much bigger than her. Anyone who is strong enough, is welcome to hold her, as far as she's concerned. She doesn't react. AT. ALL. Maybe all families that have kids close in age tote the baby on their hip, even when they themselves are still babies...I don't know. But in this family, my girls love babies. They feed her, help get sippy cups, clean up after her, entertain her, read to her, try to make her laugh and even change diapers.

I really don't like blanket statements. I try not to make them. I don't like pigeon hole-ing any of my girls. I hear people do it with their own children and it concerns me. 

I've had people say to me: 

'My Suzy-Q is a tomboy. She would never like something like that.'

or

'My Suzy-Q a girly girl. She only does ____. '

When we as parents tell them what they are, or who they are, WE have defined them. We have told them everything they need to know. What they are and what they will become... in our opinion. 

That's not our job as parents. 

It's probably insecurity. Mom's just trying their best. Who don't know better. But God DOES.

God has made each child soooo unique and cool and interesting. Everything is not black and white. I have learned in my years of parenting, there is a lot of gray. 

And the LORD is in charge. Not me. 

Here's water for a weary Mama-soul...

'He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young.' Isaiah 40:11

I would consider it sad if I limited one of my children because of MY own insecurities or doubts or even worse, peer pressure of how the other parents are doing it. Hmmm...

I think we as Mama's LONG for help. 

Let me help you.

We have to give the reigns of child rearing back to the Lord. My kids are His anyway. YOUR kids are His anyway. He loves them SO much more than we could ever dream of. 

'I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my loving eye on you.' Psalm 32:8

Thankfully HE leads US. So we can lead them. Whew. The pressure is gone. The one who made stars, and made starfish, and made stargazer lilies is available to us. To help us. 

'Lord, be gracious to us; we long for you. Be our strength every morning, our salvation in time of distress.' Isaiah 33:2

'He who has compassion on them will guide them and lead them beside springs of water.' Isaiah 49:10

As my girls get older I am BLOWN AWAY that God was so creative with so many different types and personalities of girls...all in one family.

So as I seek the Lord in raising these girls, I think the greatest influence I can have is not what I say...but what I DO, infront of my girls. How I talk to Brian. How I treat him. The tone I use. My body language with him. What a tall order. It's so humbling to really grasp THAT. And what do I do with my free time? Let them 'catch' you reading your bible....everyday. They won't forget. I promise you. Even when they are old and gray, THAT is something they will remember. 

These girls are learning more than 'just' surfing this week. Brian is teaching them to throw a cast net. And I'm teaching them how to cross stitch. 

 They are watching us. They are always watching us. 

Just a few more days at the beach... 

Feeling confident that somewhere in heaven there will be soft white sand and a warm breeze.

But may all who seek you rejoice and be glad in you; may those who long for your saving help always say, 'The LORD is great!'' Psalm 40:16

It's true. The Lord is GREAT. 

1 week and 6 days of Bliss

'Look to the Lord and his strength; seek his face always.' 1 Chronicles 16:11

The question all people, young and old, ask is this. 'What do the girls think of the new addition to the family?'...

The girls adore their new sister. They LOVE her. I love watching them blossom, full of love for her. They find JOY just looking at her. 

Thus far, absolutely, no jealousy. They cannot get enough of her. And my concern was that they would have a hard time sharing her. I had Mama nightmares about one sister pulling one arm, one sister pulling the other arm, and Angel pulling her little feet. :) But they are patient. And take turns holding her. I am so grateful. And Ang has stopped sucking her thumb and getting nervous every time she's around. She now loves her. Serious adoration. She hugs her. She calls her Eleanor Bliss.

'Mommy. Eleanor Bliss is crying.'
'Mommy. Eleanor Bliss is in the swing!'
(kiss kiss) 'I love you Eleanor Bliss.'

Always, she smothers her with gentle kisses and hugs that are a little to tight for Eleanor Bliss.

Our new season is A LOT of work. With no relatives within 80 miles, it is 'on'. Four little ones 6 and under feel like many moving parts. It's constant. I am forever counting to 4, to be sure all are ok and accounted for... maybe it's because I'm sleepy. But especially when they all go different directions. 1 napping here, 2 on bikes, 1 in the backyard....

I am working my booty off. The silly stuff that takes time and is necessary...dishes, laundry, keeping up with a toddler, making sure she doesn't kill herself etc. And then there is the Kindergartner that I am teaching. It's 30 hours of work for every 24, FOR SURE.

Anytime I want encouragement, I look over... and there is Brian, working his booty off. We DON'T stop, from sun-up to sun-down. The moment he comes in from work, he jumps in. Gone are the lazier days. They will return, I am sure. We are in the weeds. All work right now. It will even out. I know it will. But not for a little while. I am hoping by summer we will have evened out. 

Babies seem to either spit up or they don't. She's a spit-er-up-er. Carlisle was a spit-er-up-er. But she was four babies ago, so I forgot just how much laundry goes along with it. There are colossal amounts of laundry to be done. Spit-er-up-ers don't just juice themselves, they get the people holding them and other things. All of which get thrown into my washing machine. 

I'm serious, I bet our water bill just went up in the last week and 6 days. 

NOTHING encourages me like the truth from God's Word.

'He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he GENTLY LEADS those that have young.' Isaiah 40:11

I have to figure out how to make time for the EXTRAS. I am speaking to the women at our church on May 5th. I am not sure when to write down my thoughts. I'll get it. It may be in the middle of the night. Or early in the morning. 

Early morning sister time. Sleep-filled snuggles and big love before breakfast. 

Looking very protective. 

But not as protective as the big guy...

Ellie Bliss has her own body guard.

No one is protective like Big Papa Bear. 

We took all four of the girls to their homeschool Fine Arts night. (I need to upload the video and put it on here.) 

Baby was 9 days old. Brian draped a blanket over her carseat. He was her body guard. A few were brave enough to ask if they could peak in under the blanket to see her. 

He looked so foreboding, even I (true story) asked if I could look under the blanket. 

I wanted permission. From the big buff dude. He looked pretty serious about his role.

And he is. 

He wants to keep her well. No sicknesses.

 

New for me.

Something fresh for the warm days. 

It's lighter and got a few extra layers. :) 

Can hardly explain my excitement to pack these two tubbies full of maternity clothes and stick them far out of reach. Happy enough that I took a picture of it. 

Now they understand

Our 

wait 

is 

over.

24 hours old.

She is in our arms. 

The wait. The weight. All of it, is over.

I stare at her all day. I can't get enough of her. At ALL. I adore kissing her. I drink in her little face. Her fuzzy hair. Her tiny body.

She is a peaceful, sleepy baby. She reminds me of my days as a new Mother when Carlisle was a baby. They both are tremendous sleepers, happy to sleep through meal times, loud sister times and anytimes...

She is comfortable sleeping her days away right now, so I join her. I am taking advantage of Brian being home to sleep when she sleeps. I think I may have forgotten how sleepy these days are for me too. Recovering. She is the sweetest smelling, snuggly little one and so warm. It's easy to fall asleep snuggled up with her. 

This is one of my favorite stages. I love newborns. But I especially love her.

None of the girls seem to have the first jealous thought of her. They love and adore her. She gets held, kissed, hugged and passed from arms to arms, and burped, whether or not she needs it, over more shoulders than any other baby thus far. They are smitten. And so proud to be her big sister.

They brought a neighbor friend in, straight out of bicycle riding time, to meet her. I was in the next room and I hear them quietly tiptoeing up to her little bassinet, bicycle helmets still strapped on. 

And then, hushed whispers... 'isn't she cute?' and 'isn't she so sweet?'... 'I love her.'

I told the girls the entire time I was pregnant, 'This is your baby too. Not just mine. God is giving her to all of us.'

Now. They understand. 

The birth story ~ The short version

Eleanor Bliss Edwards ~ Our bundle of chubby, juicy, sweet, darling love.

After a long pregnancy...she is with us. Warmly welcomed into our family on Tuesday, April 10, 2012. 

After much belaboring and delaying and 10 months of praying. I asked the doctor to break my water. I was 41 weeks pregnant. I thought, her being the 5th, she would have decided to come on by now and meet these big sisters. But she's more patient than that. More patient than I.

I knew we would soon be leaving the safe window of time for having a baby. And God gave me a peace that it was her time.

I chose Tuesday, April 10th, hoping my Mom would be able to come before her surgery the next day. 

41 weeks ~ Eleanor's Condo

 Eviction Day.

Reader beware. The details. Not for everyone. Just those that love hearing about natural childbirth.
(More details and pictures to come...after I get some sleep.)  :)

• The doctor broke my water at 8:00am, on the nose. I explained that I didn't want pitocin or an epidural. I just want me, the baby and God to do it. Oh, and that I am really shooting for the baby to have arrived by Noon. The doctor nods, we talk about a few things and he leaves. Brian and I laugh and joke that my chart for SURE has an asterisk beside my name that means 'this chick is nuts' and 'watchout for this one she's trouble.'

• First distinctly hard contraction hits at 9:15am. Contractions 8-10 min apart. I think to self, 'now this is the kind of contraction I need to get this baby out.'

• Call my friend Lindsay at 9:23am. She reads scripture to me for 15-20 minutes, I silently cry and nod as she reads to me from my favorite book, The Word of God...contractions all the while getting closer. Feel peace and calm descend into the room 'by the washing with water through the word.' Ephesians 5:26. One of the verses I cling to during the day is 'For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.' 2 Timothy 1:7

• 10:10am I say to Brian, 'getting a baby out takes a LOT of work.' Feeling overwhelmed knowing I still have potential hours to go. Contractions 4-5 min apart.

• 11:15am I ask Brian to go get the nurse to check me. I feel the baby moving along. 6cm -100% effaced. Brian is my Knight in shining armor. He holds my one hand with his big strong hand, and the other hand presses into my back. The air is so cold in the room that his hands are cold. They feel so refreshing every time I grab them for a contraction. He fans my sweaty face in-between contractions. I am breathing. It's all I can do. I count down in my head from 20 to 1 with each breath. The contractions are about a minute or so long. It's the worst minute of my life, then it's over. Then I get a minute or two break before I do it again. I lay still, on my side. I fall asleep for a minute and 1/2 or two before the next contraction comes.

• 11:25am I can feel her moving through my body. I am closer and closer to getting to meet her. I know the worst is yet to come. Which is amazing considering how ridiculously hard everything already is. It can't get harder. Can it? I ask Brian to have the nurse check me again. 8cm. I say to her 'Homestretch?' My eyes are closed, but it sounds like she smiles when she says, 'Yes, homestretch.'

• A few minutes later. I ask her to check me again. I'm 9 cm. The contractions are so horribly intense I think they could seriously make me go blind, or do some sort of irreparable damage to me psychologically. I know that I will want to forget it, but don't think I ever will. 

• I ask Brian to help me lay onto my back. He does so quickly and with no trouble. I say to the nurse, 'Call the Doctor.' She says, 'I already did.' 

• I am on my back, with the most insane urge to push. I tell the nurse, 'I need the stirups. It's time to push. Did you call the doctor? Is he here?' She's telling me yes, but the contractions are so close together. And I am pushing.

• It's excruciating. Like being run over by a Mack truck...but worse. I have no words for this part...I never will.

• My body says PUSH. So I do. This part is foggy. Need Brian to fill in the gaps. I push. She is right there. I feel her. I push more. She is coming. I push more. She is being delivered.  I push the last time and she is out. It's 11:56am. The doctor laughs that we made it with 4 minutes to spare. I say, 'someone high-five somebody.' Not sure if anyone does it. I am in la-la land.

• They lay her on my chest. The doctor asks Brian if he wants to cut the cord. I can hear Brian say yes with joy and excitement. My eyes are still closed, I hear relief in Brian's voice. I don't have to see her or know that she is perfect. I can hear it in Brian's voice.

• God did it all. HE delivered me from the pain and suffering and feelings I can't describe. 'For great is your love toward me; you have delivered me from the depths of the grave.' Psalm 86:13

• I start shouting, 'Thank you JESUS! THANK YOU JESUS! Thank you Jesus!' Brian says that I said it over and over. 65+ times. Brian hears one of the nurses in the room say, 'Um hm...I know that's right.' 

• I continue to celebrate and offer praise to God for delivering ME. I hear Brian laughing at how big, plump and juicy she is. I told him before she arrived that she would, for sure, be 8 lbs +. I could tell.

                    Meeting one another, seconds after birth. 

Everyone in the room is amazed and our jaws hit the floor as she is measured. 8 lbs 11 oz. She has something I have never seen on one of our girls. FAT ROLLS. She is like a warm buttered biscuit. 

UNBELIEVABLY huge. 

Carlisle ~ 6 lbs 10 oz

Evelyn ~ 7 lbs 3 oz

Vivian ~ 7 lbs 15 oz

Whooper Jr. ~ 8 lbs 11 oz?!?!? The other girls were in the 20 - 21 1/2 inches length range. SHE is 19 inches. 

Brian says, 'she's short and fat...does she even fit in our family?!'

We laugh at her chubby cheeks. And her, not long, lean legs, but FAT ones. She was met after lunch by gentle kisses, and the proudest, sweetest sisters you've ever seen.

BLISS ~ a state of profound satisfaction, happiness and joy, a constant state of mind, undisturbed by gain or loss.